…and Then I Remembered

After what I refer to as “murder semester,” a long-time derby acquaintance (who I will call “Raucous Ron,” as that is his name) invited me to come out to Kansas City for a few days.

As I have whined a few times, I haven’t had a lot of time for derby these past few months… I’ve been kind “eh,” like “what do I do?” The things that used to get me fucking pumped have left me kinda… eh, you know? I announced 2 bouts this season and that was super fun, yeah, but I keep thinking back to how just stupid excited I used to get…

And then I did, again. I went to my pal Shady’s birthday party and co-announced this really great double-header the next day. The DH was a co-ed mashup (Cowtown Butchers, who I have a collective crush on vs. Dead Girl Derby, who I have wanted to go see for years) with MADE rules, followed by KCRW Plan B vs. DGD B Team… the first half MADE, second half WFTDA.

OMG, it was amazing!!! I felt like I was derby-young again!

Partly because my brain is back to where I was in 2010, but mostly because I felt love πŸ™‚ When you first start reffing, you just are looking… staring into a bunch of bodies thinking “what are you doing? Ok, that’s fi… wait. No… well, did that? Oh, elbows… number? Fuck… too late… whistle… shit. Okokok. Game face gamefacegameface…” Reffing is a hard game, you guys, for serious. Announcing is a fun game, but, I’m not sure if it’s my brain gearing over from “silence, mouth; you must only say the penalties” to “narrate that business!!!”

I am pleased as shit to report that I am loving the change over, though πŸ™‚ I will still ref and/or NSO, because I love it, but… I can say words on a mic?! Yeah!!! I can dance? Well, theoretically, you know, if I could dance and I wanted to, it is allowed! And I smiled and people offered me high fives and I motorboated (a male) skater, knowing I couldn’t be accused of bias!!! Oh, my, yes!

The “love” part is so strange and will sound stupid, likely, but I give zero fucks. When RR said my name over the mic, KCRW was standing off to the side behind us and they cheered for me! Yay! Then, in breaks, people outside would come up and tell me how awesome it was that I came up and just nice things all the time! I love nice things! Even the pointers were nice! Nice!!! Feeling appreciated is a beautiful thing!


Even this was nice, even though it was also what we call “scary.” Nice and scary!

This was, indeed, the first time I had seen MADE in person and, hot damn, that is an exciting set up! Fast, fast, fast and the scores stay so much closer… lots of neat new things! Just lovely! And the 1/2 and 1/2 was amazing! The difference is so… different… I want to say all the things, but not be boring right now, so let me just say “fuck, I hope I get invited up for some more of that!” Ahgahdsogood!

But, better, Imma say shit I learned/did this weekend that made me smile all over. Yeah, shit is about to get slightly mushy, but I will keep it under control.

  • I saw two bouts of derby where the players smiled almost constantly. The benches were giggly, the jammers were beaming, and the penalty box looked fun. I am all for serious time and, don’t get me wrong, I like to put on my serious face, but it made my soul smile to watch jam after jam of happiness.
  • If you give a random person a shark, they will smile for a moment. If you give a Cobrashark a shark, he will smile all night.
  • Unicorns, robots, and cupcakes are the key to making smiles.
  • Tie chains make you look even more pimping than usual.
  • Boys can fit into girls shorts, but sometimes… it’s… uh, peculiar.
  • If you are from out of town, you can avoid being sucked into weird drama by pretending not to know people’s names. Hooray for feigning ignorance!
  • I found out I know a lot of people with secret PhDs.
  • I want to travel through secret places in Asia with Shady. Ron can come, as long as we don’t go to Singapore.
I'm back and looking as disappointed as ever. I smile on the inside, ok.

I’m back and looking as disappointed as ever. I smile on the inside, ok.

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